You might be spending today alone, with no soulmate and nobody you can call your partner in crime, but don’t be so hard on yourself. You are where you need to be right now and God has a special plan for you.
Love is not just romantic, it comes in many forms – self love, familial love, friendship, love of strangers – it’s endless. To focus on only one of these on this day is to forfeit the opportunities to give and receive love that exist in life. The position we’re in right now says that we need not focus on romantic love because the love we have around us from family and friends is enough to support us on our journey currently.
Maybe we feel a bit lost in our own life or maybe we’re starting to figure some things out about ourselves that we didn’t know before. Whatever the case, your singleness is a time to explore who you are at the core. It’s an opportunity to exercise self love in a way that supports your self esteem and self worth. Learning how to love ourselves is the first step in letting others in to love us. How will others be able to love us if we do not even love ourselves?
Singleness is an opportunity to exercise self love in a way that supports your self esteem and self worth.
Self respect is a big thing. It means we are more concerned with our long term prosperity rather than short term fixes. We’re happy to sit in our singleness for a bit longer than others rather than rushing into a relationship that just solves our loneliness in the immediate future. Patience is a big thing too, and chances are you’re still single because you’ve been patient in waiting for the right person.
If we continue to work on ourselves in our times of loneliness and present a stronger version of ourselves we will begin to attract stronger relationships. If we become more confident in ourselves, we will attract others that are confident in themselves too – if we begin to show compassion, we will attract those that truly value compassion. So go after whatever makes your heart tick and makes you a more loving person, and you will attract the same.
On the other hand, if you’ve just come out of a relationship and you’re struggling to be alone don’t be afraid to let your emotions run free. It’s a time for reflection. I’d advise you to avoid social media and the artificially constructed moments that people post up. What we want is real wholesome love – not the one that gets plastered over social media – that’s just fake. You might cry as you reflect on your lost relationship and your mistakes made and that’s an important part of recovery.
If you find yourself needing someone to lean on, talk to a friend or find comfort in family. Like I said, love will come in many forms and sometimes the love you receive from family and friends will empower you to love yourself more and will propel yourself into a better person.
Many people get to share in some great moments on Valentine’s day, but not all understand it’s value. Yes, Valentine’s day is one day of the year, but those that are in true, wholesome and committed relationships know that love stretches beyond the fake facade of superficial gifts and artificial instagram posts.
So if you’re spending Valentine’s day alone, trust God’s timing in your process and exercise some self love. Grab yourself a nice bowl of ice cream, or go for a run, whatever makes you feel happy and loved, God will handle the rest.
~ Adam, 2019